Out with the Old Self (What Real Transformation Looks Like)
An abstract of TBC Lead Pastor Connor Kraus’ sermon on November 9, 2025, in the Book of Ephesians series. Watch the sermon video here.
Have you ever run into someone after years apart and thought, "Wow, they've really changed"? Maybe it was at a high school reunion, an unexpected meeting at the grocery store, or a reconnection on social media. Sometimes the change is dramatic—someone who had a rough past has turned their life around, made healthier choices, or become a kinder person than you remembered.
The Bible says something similar should happen when you trust in Christ. Not only does your soul gain a new eternal home, but your whole life gets reshaped to reflect the new image God has created in you. While growing into that holy standard takes a lifetime, trusting Jesus should mark a clear before-and-after moment in your life. You should be able to look back on your "before" self and marvel at how far God has brought you. And for those around you, your transformation should be visible too.
But maybe you've put your faith in Jesus and don't feel all that different. Maybe your "after Jesus" life still feels a lot like your "before Jesus" life. If that's you, this message is a great opportunity to pause, reflect, and see what it might look like to step more fully into the new self God has called you to become.
What We're Walking Away From
In Ephesians 4:17-19, Paul paints a picture of what life looks like without Christ. He talks about people who walk "in the futility of their thoughts" with darkened understanding, excluded from the life of God because of the ignorance and hardness of their hearts.
This might sound harsh, but Paul isn't commenting on anyone's intelligence. He's saying that when someone rejects Christ, they can't see the world clearly. Their understanding is darkened, like trying to navigate a bedroom in the middle of the night without turning on the light.
Think about it: when you stub your toe on a toy or trip over something in the dark, most of us decide to turn on the light. But the person who rejects God chooses to keep walking in darkness. Their heart becomes hard toward even the idea of light. "I didn't need the light before, and I certainly don't need it now!"
Here's the sad part: a mind that can't understand spiritual truth and a heart that's committed to rebellion inevitably lead to sinful actions. Paul says they "gave themselves over to promiscuity for the practice of every kind of impurity with a desire for more and more." Their lust for self-serving and ungodly practices becomes insatiable, only making their spiritual situation worse.
It's a bleak picture. But it's not the end of the story.
The Power of a Transformed Mind
Through the power of Christ, even the darkest mind can be completely redeemed. Ephesians 4:20-24 shows us how this works.
First, you hear and learn about Christ. You begin to understand what truth is. Then you place your faith in Jesus as your Savior and Lord. Simply hearing or knowing about God isn't enough for radical transformation to happen. It only occurs when you trust in Jesus. After that, God's Spirit lives within you, renewing your mind and changing your entire outlook.
Paul describes this process like taking off old, dirty clothes and putting on new, clean ones. Instead of being excluded from the life of God, you're pursuing a life created by God. Instead of a hard-hearted and callous attitude, you're growing in righteousness and purity. Instead of being ignorant of the truth, you're basing your life on the truth of Jesus.
In Romans 12:2, Paul writes: "Do not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God."
As your mind is transformed by the power of Christ and the truth of His Word, you begin to want this renewed way of living. You want to change. It's actually returning to the correct way of living—the way you were originally designed and created by God.
Why Change Feels So Hard
Sounds great, right? But here's the honest truth: it's easier said than done.
Have you ever tried to take off clothes that are completely soaked? You want to get them off, but it's a hard process. That's what removing the old self can feel like. You want the new life, but the old self is so ingrained in your habits. Remember, it's not just your actions that need changing—this transformation touches your heart and mind, two things notorious for their stubbornness.
Why does it so often feel like you're spinning your tires in the mud, falling into the same sins again and again? You're not alone in this struggle. Even the apostle Paul felt it:
"For I do not understand what I am doing, because I do not practice what I want to do, but I do what I hate... What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!" (Romans 7:15-25)
You live in that same tension: called to holiness, yet battling a nature that resists it. Until Christ returns, that fight continues. But it's a fight worth engaging.
What's Really at Stake
Your salvation isn't at stake—that was secured by grace through faith in Jesus Christ. But your commitment to putting on this new identity in Christ has real consequences for many other things:
Your witness to others
Your closeness with God
Your influence in the church
Your readiness for spiritual battle
Your inner peace and contentment
Your eternal rewards in Heaven
That's why you need to commit to intentional change—putting off sin and putting on new habits that honor God.
Six Areas for Transformation
In Ephesians 4:25-32, Paul gives us specific examples of what this looks like. For each category, there's a twofold process: putting off sin and putting on new habits that honor God. Here are six areas to consider:
1. Speaking Falsehoods → Speaking Truth
The old self tells fish stories, takes credit for work that wasn't yours, or leaves out important details. You're not committed to the truth, even though it would set you free.
The new self speaks with the honesty of Christ, who never hid the truth from His followers. You speak openly, graciously, and become worthy of trust.
A lying heart pleases itself, but a loving heart tells the truth.
2. Sinful Anger → Righteous Anger
The old self is irritable, snaps at the kids in the car, and keeps a record of wrongs. You get angry quickly and hold onto it.
The new self understands that when anger comes—and it will—it should be for righteous reasons and shouldn't become a foothold for Satan. You surrender your anger to God, the one who will make all things right in the end.
A bitter heart keeps score, but a forgiving heart lets go.
3. Taking from Others → Giving to Others
The old self doesn't report the cash you earned, wastes time on the clock, or downloads what isn't yours. You take what isn't yours and find reasons to make it okay.
The new self doesn't just pursue honest work—you work with a purpose in mind: to give to those in need. Generosity flows from a heart that seeks others before yourself.
A greedy heart justifies taking, but a grateful heart delights in giving.
4. "Tearing Down" → "Building Up"
The old self joins in on gossip, vents anger in the comment section, or uses sarcasm as a shield. You use words as weapons and like to see them cause wounds.
The new self uses words as tools to encourage others. You understand the power of your voice and use it to build up the body and bring life to the weary.
A gossiping heart hurts, but a kind heart helps.
5. Grieving God → Glorifying God
The old self ignores conviction, justifies sin, and takes glory that was never meant for you in the first place. Your subtle rejections of God hurt Him personally.
The new self recognizes the blessings of God and delights in finding more ways to honor Him with your life. You don't obey out of necessity, but out of love for your King.
A proud heart steals God's glory, but a humble heart gives it back.
6. Lacking Grace → Giving Grace
The old self moves fast and loud, overwhelming your opponent. There always seems to be someone on your enemies list.
The new self is filled with grace and love. You treat others the way your Savior has treated you—with forgiveness. You seek to live at peace with people.
A wounded heart holds grudges, but a healed heart gives grace.
Your Next Step
Growth in faith always requires intentional effort. You don't walk worthy of your calling by default, and you don't drift into sanctification by accident. But as you put off the sins of the old self and pursue the new, you begin to live out the calling God has placed on your life.
Where can you put off the old self today? And what part of the new self do you need to put on?
Maybe you're reading this and realizing you've never actually taken that first step of trusting in Jesus. Maybe you're still walking in the dark, trying to navigate life without the light. The good news is that it's not too late. God's grace is available to you right now.
We'd love to help you explore what it means to experience this transformation—to take off the old self and put on the new. Join us this Sunday at 9:00 or 10:30 a.m. and discover what real change looks like when Christ transforms your life from the inside out.